Dear Sir/Madam,
I am a regular(ish) visitor to the wonderful Barney website, and am quite possibly the cute dinosaur's biggest (it's possible I mean that in a literal sense. Pffft.) fan. I can imagine that you must have close connections with Barney (I'm sorry, I don't know his surname), and so I was wondering if you could pass on the attached picture to him. For a very long time now, I've been harbouring my feelings for him, and the time has come when I think my love for him should be publicly declared. You see, my thoughts of Barney are now staring to interrupt the day to day running of my life. Psychology classes have been turned into an opportunity to talk about him and sing his songs; ring binders merely an excuse to scribble love notes to Barney on.
As I'm sure you can understand, these feelings are too strong for me to keep to myself. I would appreciate it if you could let Barney know how I feel, and perhaps arrange a date for us? (me and Barney that is, not you and I)
Thank you very much for your time and help